Danny & Ben

(L-R): Danny O'Rourke, Ben Daulton (wearing his Best Camper medal) and Wendy O'Rourke share a moment at the 2009 Capernaum Week at Rockbridge camp.


by John Koehler

Tara Criste knew she had to get Ben and Tommy Daulton to camp, no matter what. Tara is the Associate Area Director of Young Life Capernaum in Hampton Roads. She worked on Ben and Tommy's dad, Dave, and finally it all came together; they both came to camp. This fact in and of itself is no big deal. Plenty of kids come to camp with Capernaum. What was a big deal was that both boys were potential behavioral problems, especially away from their Dad.

When I realized that Dave was not coming I said to Tara, "Well you've done it now. We have two boys who may cause big problems and no way of knowing exactly what will happen." Or something equally corporate and whiny. I think Tara answered me with,"Don't worry, God will provide." I waved that off as just another Christian cliche.

But God did provide, and his name was Danny.

Turns out that Tommy was not really a problem, but on Day One, when the campers and Buddies and Leaders were all getting their camp legs and figuring out what was what and missing home, Ben was melting down. Ornery and upset, not wanting to go along with his cabin mates. Starved for love and attention, he acted out.

Danny was just a 13-year-old middle school kid signed up as a Buddy because his parents and sister were coming. Danny's dad Marty is the pastor at Church of the Messiah, home of our Chesapeake Club. His sister Molly is an old hand with Capernaum and served as a club buddy and had been to camp several times already. Wendy is the mom and also well versed with the people of Capernaum.

But Danny had never really done much with Capernaum, and wasn't really sure what the whole deal was. I remember seeing him on his bunk on Day One while the cabin was in an uproar. His look was pure "deer in the headlights." I let him be.

The next day we had a talk about stepping up and serving the kids and treating them like little brothers. This could be pretty hard to take for a young man half the size of some of our campers, and less than half the size of a big dude like Ben. I'm not sure if Danny got assigned to Ben, if he picked him or Ben picked him. Either way I'm pretty sure God set the whole thing up.

Ben lumbers. He's a big dude and when he walks he lumbers along at a pace befitting a barge or something else equally large. You don't hurry with Ben. You wait for Ben and you ease along with Ben. Danny is speedy and wiry and coordinated. Ben is awkward and uncoordinated. Danny speaks clearly and with intelligence. Ben is hard to understand and his intelligence of the brain is limited. But he's plenty smart where it counts: in his heart.

How good is God to bring these two together? Polar opposites, yet so much in common according to God. I remember seeing them together on Day Two, holding hands, walking along happy as well.... happy as campers! I had trouble with the image because it was so incongruous, so odd, so strange and out of place. This little boy/man with the world as his oyster (pearls included) together with the huge man/boy who could never get past the ugly oyster shell.

But there they were just happier than jaybirds, jabbering away. Danny's fear was gone and so was Ben's need to act out, because here was a friend who loved him from top to bottom, inside out with a cherry on top. Which took away his fear of loss and the pain of losing his dad, even for a day much less a week. Because Ben had Danny, his replacement dad, the man child who loved him like the dad back home who was temporarily forgotten until the bus brought them back together.

There is nothing that God can't do and everything he will do in a pinch or even when you don't believe it is possible. Because God does not do based on our unbelief, but on the depth and width and size of his love for us. And that is almost unbelievable. Which gives me hope and makes me believe that there is a chance for us all.

At a Young Life camp up in the mountains of Virginia near the little town of Goshen, God showed me his mercy and grace and glory and love love love like a river flowing down through the woods while the deer bend their heads to nibble the grass and brook trout explode up to capture the fies. Ahhh, I do thank God for Danny and Ben, for doing the impossible in a way that God makes possible in us all.

If we just try to love another and treat each other like family then God will do the rest. Because when we love one another by way of agape we are loving on the creation and the creator, the living being that made it and us all.

In August of 2009 I saw God walking among us at a place called Rockbridge, and he looked exactly like two men I know named Ben and Danny. They're friends of mine and so is God.

Love,

John

PS- Marty just reminded me of something that happened at Camp, and which may be part of the reason why Ben took to Danny so well. Seems that Ben had a brother named Danny who died when he was very young. When Ben met the living Danny he remembered his dead Danny and knew God had brought his brother back. God brought Danny back for Ben's sake. Maybe a piece of the old Danny is in him, but for sure a piece of God were and are in them both. Either way, Ben and his new brother Danny get a good deal! How good is God?